Hot Rod with Commentary I

Now, I know I'm no commentary genius or anything, but I have watched a couple of commentaries. I remember my first, the commentary for The Matrix. It was pretty boring. After that I was all, who wants commentary? What's the point of DVDs anyway? Special features? Commentary is for nerds. And lo and behold, I was right. Commentary is so for nerds. Well, a nerd I be.
What's so great about commentaries? I'm not sure, really. I guess if you're into "filmmaking" which I'm really not, aside for my pipe dreams of owning a professional camera and dolly and driving it through my tiny apartment hallway for extreme close-ups on Leonardo DiCaprio and Jake Gyllenhaal, I don't know much about film. Grips, they hold those floating microphones right? Nailed it. Anyway, I guess people who are into becoming directors and such would, you know, watch the commentaries to understand more about the process of film and all that, uh, stuff. I, on the other hand, care mostly about entertainment and good old-fashioned belly-laughing. So, as a result, commentaries should strictly be used for more jokes, if they were are specifically tailored to me, which they are. (JK) SOOOOO, I only watch commentaries for comedies and in specific, comedies where the actors are also the writers or directors, or in comedies where I want to be the actor's friend. This has never been more true than it is for my one true soulmates: Jorma Taccone, Akiva Schaffer, and Andy Samberg.
As a result, I have watched, and will continue to watch, the BluRay disc of Hot Rod with commentary about once a week every week. Why!? It's delightful. Part of the fun is that no one watches the movie without commentary let alone with, it's like I'm a comedic genius with all the jokes no one has ever heard because I stole them from the commentary. The best part about the commentary is that you really get to feel like a true stalker in the laziest sense of the word. By this, I mean that I get to feel like The Lonely Island crew are my buds, but I just sit there and listen to all their jokes, and I feel like they really like me and all I have to do is something really crazy like blow-up a building so that they'll truly love me. That's how logic works, right? Anyway, my suggestion after all of this is, don't watch Hot Rod with commentary. It'll never live up to your expectations because of how great I make it sound, A. And B, if you get addicted to it too, then I will never hold the world record for number of times watching Hot Rod with commentary. Honestly, if I were to ballpark it, I would say I've seen it with commentary aroud 30 times, wow.
In conclusion, who wants to be my friend now?
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